I know i belong here at college. but i dont feel like i belong with the people around me. i wish i had friends like i had back in Columbus. but these people are different.
i miss the familiar.
i miss home.
i hope it gets better, it probably will. but for now i feel like the odd one out that everyone thinks is really ackward and selcusive. i'm not like that. why am i acting like i am? its terrible, this feeling. knowing you belong someone but no one else thinks you do.
I hope after these next couple weeks it will heal. i hope so. but probably not. next year it will be better. i wish i just could find a way to cope with this that isnt destructive to myself. it seems everything i do is.
Sigh. i guess being myself around these people and trying to maintain excellence clashes. but i need excellence more than i need myself.
No comments:
Post a Comment